I woke during the night with the song Holly Jolly Christmas by Burl Ives playing in my head.

And wow, would it not stop. LOL The chorus that kept playing in my head for almost 4 hours was:

Ho, Ho, the mistletoe,

Hung where you can see…

Somebody waits for me

Kiss her once for me!

Now the lyrics are actually “Somebody waits for “you” not “me”, but I’ve noticed that lyrics that get stuck in my head always have a specific meaning and the words aren’t always exact. The wording can change the meaning. I meditated on it, and realized it came from my twin flame Adam.

But there seemed to be another message/idea there, for it got me to thinking back to when I was a kid and how much I loved watching the old Christmas cartoons. Yes, I am that old. LOL Every Christmas, we would watch them religiously. So these old Christmas classics from the TV shows are very dear to me. Of course, when I got up, I had to download the songs for myself to play during the season.

It seems that this year is going to be a solo Christmas for me…my parents are not doing well, with my father in a home and my mother just having surgery for a twisted bowel. They are not going to be able to do Christmas this year. Now, I have 3 sisters, and it seems that now that everyone is older, and the kids are adults, Christmas is getting less…relevant. I haven’t believed in the religious aspect for decades, but I have always enjoyed it for the color and lights and family get-togethers. Not the food, since I am mostly vegan and my family is not. Since I have been poverty-stricken most of this century, I stopped giving out gifts a long time ago. So of course, I don’t get any either. Which is fine, since I am into de-cluttering my life and don’t need knick knacks and things I don’t really want or need. And the whole family is not well-off either, so times have been tough for a while.

As a result, we all have small homes that can’t host the whole immediate family of a dozen or more people. I live in a small, one bedroom apartment, my youngest sister has a tiny, one bedroom house she rents with her 2 dogs, my other sister has a tiny 2 bedroom house, and my other middle sister just moved into a 3 bedroom apartment after leaving her husband. It seems my youngest sister is going to Toronto to be with her daughter there, and may be taking my one niece with her, leaving my sister here in town alone for Christmas too. Although she plans to have Christmas dinner with her other daughter and her daughter’s boyfriend. My sister in Windsor will no doubt have a turkey for her and her family…my BIL loves his turkey, so he will be ecstatic to have one to himself! LOL This same sister has fibromyalgia, and recently had a stroke, so she will not want to be coming to town, and without a vehicle, I cannot go visit them.

Thus, it’s looking like I will be spending Christmas alone this year. sigh Ah well…c’est la vie. I have been thinking of starting new traditions anyway. Family dynamics always change, and they are becoming such that holidays are not so important any longer. Christmas was the last bastion for us though, one we all tried to celebrate together.

But I’m not willing to give in to depression or anything. Since I don’t believe in the whole Jesus story, and the crass commercialism of Christmas today leaves me cold, it is definitely time to come up with new traditions and find relevance in the season again. Which got me to thinking about what I loved as a child, and made me happy back then. The Christmas music and the shows were definitely a big part of it. So I found YouTube videos of all the old TV shows, and plan on doing a marathon of them on Christmas day. This makes me smile. I will make some buttered rum and make shortbread cookies to munch on! Mmmm…my mother’s shortbread cookies are the best! I wonder if there’s any of my mother’s fruitcake around? Her recipe is the BEST as well! It’s a dark, moist cake, mostly all fruit, wrapped in rum. Mmmm!

Anyway…I’ve downloaded these old songs to listen to, to get me into the Christmas mood, and I will watch the old TV shows on Christmas day…all thanks to the song that was stuck in my head this morning! Thank you Adam for the ideas. ❤