An interesting thing happened this morning…my MOTN meditation this morning was on abundance. I am working on Andrew Martin’s challenge “Choose More of What You Desire“, and my desire is more abundance. I know I have work to do on this concept, since I am living considerably below the poverty level! I have been working on affirming more abundance, not money, into my life.

Well, this morning I made a startling breakthrough…I realized that I already have plenty of “stuff” that I have collected over the years, and I don’t actually need much. I have lots of crystals and stones, and crystal necklaces so I don’t need mala beads. I have lots of fabric, so I don’t need to buy bags for my tarot deck or my cards for my crystal divination set, I don’t need another kitty (my sister’s kid found an abandoned kitty and wanted me to take it on), I have lots of art supplies if I want to get back into that, I have lots of Christmas ornaments and doodads, especially now that I have inherited a bunch from my parents…it just goes on and on. I have plenty. What do I need more abundance for???

Okay…it’s the end of the month and I’m running low on funds for food and necessities. I don’t really need a lot of food, although I’d like to get some more vegan ham for sandwiches and some more pickles. I think I may need more treats for my kitties. I definitely need more kitty litter…the litter is expensive, and more than I have left. I am affirming that it will be sufficient to get me through though.

I did a crystal spread yesterday based on a tarot spread for abundance. All the stones that turned up were spiritual stones…which confused me. Like, what the hell does this mean? My lack of abundance is a spiritual problem? I was racking my brains to try to figure out in what way am I sabotaging myself spiritually. I am already aware of the past life where I was a monk and had taken a vow of poverty, and I have an affirmation to dissolve that vow from a previous lifetime. I have been working on the feelings associated with that vow…that money is bad and if I want to be spiritual I have to give up the “fruits of the flesh”, etc, etc.

Then I was led to this video by Victor Oddo that hit a nerve…I still have that feeling that anyone who is wealthy is a bad person, and I don’t want to become greedy and grasping and a bad person too. I do have the mindset that the “elite” are globalists and evil satanists that steal children and sacrifice them, keep humanity downtrodden, etc, etc. I do have that niggling worry that if I were to get wealthy, “they” would come after me and try to get me to be like them. If I refused, they might harm or kill me and my family. Yup…geez, that’s a really yucky mental block to try to get through! sigh Thinking on how to overcome that, I was led to this other, very uplifting video by Andrew Martin…”The Importance of Being Human“.

It doesn’t actually address the whole evil people are wealthy idea, but it does emphasize something very important that I have been forgetting…that I am a sovereign human being who deserves good things just because I am a Divine spark of God. He goes into what a wonderful thing it is to be human right now, at this point in time, on the precipice of this wondrous Event of Ascension. I love Andrew’s passion and compassion…he’s so very eloquent! This is the point I have been missing…that I am here as a human being to do something very important to usher in a wonderful new way of being for all of us…and being human is more than “good enough”! I am more than good enough because I chose to come here at this time to help usher in this New Age…it was an amazing thing I did! An amazing thing we all did…to be here at this time and go through all that we are going through to birth a new way of being.

So…I deserve the abundance that is my birthright as a Divine Spark of God. And really thinking about it, I have always had it…I have always been alright despite the seeming lack of financial funds. I have survived on only $598/mo, and I am doing well despite only getting $1175/mo. I always seem to have the funds to pay my bills and get the food I need. My kitties have never done without…well, I always make sure of that! LOL But somehow, abundance has always come to me whenever I have needed it…and I just need to remember that I do have everything I need already!